Finally. some time to catch my breath and maybe... live a little. or not.

FYP's been nothing but draining up till now. put it simply, being driven into a not well thought out plan, poor planning, adding up to my lack of initiative in the first place (i wouldn't do fyp if it wasn't forced down our throats)... an equation leading up to a final: what the f* have i been wasting my days and nights for? a project that got simply shot down. even i don't see the point in my own project. one thing i took away from this? i regret. the time wasted on such a meaningless project, quite some worrying for nothing, trying to beat such a terrible grading system and... just the entire process. well that's there, one more poster to go and i'm done. yeah i almost never regret anything much i do, but this is it.

these 2 weeks have been nothing but taxing. physically and mentally. mm change that, mentally especially. the feeling that you're on the verge of crying, for no particular reason, constantly. as long as i'm awake. and when you get a quiet moment to yourself, a drive home, a bus ride to school, minutes before you fall asleep, that's when the worst hits. i thought i grew out of this...

okay one last reminder to self: stop trying to please everyone. the people who can't take it aren't worth it.