it's 2.37am..
yep i have school tomorrow and i'm supposed to wake up at 5.30.

talked to my dad from about 12 to 2?
while doing time tunnel 4 of course..
but... was listening to him most of the time...
talked about sooo many things
it's like i havent seen him lighten up in ages

talked about his younger days..
his regrets, achievements, stress and all that
things he wouldn't have told me if we weren't there at that exact time at that exact setting

remember how it was like to want to turn 18 when you were only 10?
wow.. now i'm near 18 and i dont think it seems all that great
yes i get to drink i get to do wilder stuffs
but...
the thing that bothers me is
why am i not looking forward to being 25 now that i'm 18?
is it because the future is so uncertain now?
and i couldn't see all that when i was 10 and looking forward to 18?
not really
i didn't know what lay ahead of me and i still looked forward to it
maybe...
that's what i really need to do now..

i believe that our future's all planned out and waiting for us to live it through...
yep and i dont think many out there agree with me.
BUT
given a chance to look at what will happen next time, be it my future husband, job and kids...
i'm quite sure i dont wanna know all that right now.
secretly... i'm still waiting for another surprise to jump right out at me ;)

woah that was alot of thinking for a time like that...
it's time i get out of thinking about how i compare to others and well.. any other stuffs regarding me me and more, me.
time i give a little more time to making each day count.
sounds a little too preachy
but it just made my life a whole lot more meaningful ;)

i see you lying next to me. with words i thought i'd never speak.
awake and unafraid. asleep or dead?

sometimes i wish i could save you. and there's so many things that i want you to know.
i won't give up till it's over.

now that it's all said and done. i can't believe you were the one.

it starts in my toes makes me crinkle my nose. wherever you go i always know.

you can put the blame on me.

if you're not the one then why does my soul feel glad today. if you're not the one then why does my hand fit yours this way. if you are not mine then why does your heart return my call. if you are not mine would i have strength to stand at all.

all my life, i pray for someone like you.

gotta let the light shine on me.

i'll be your strength. i'll give you hope. keeping your faith when it's gone.

just believe me girl someday i'll pay the bills with this guitar.

i give my hand to you with all my heart. can wait to live my life with you can't wait to start. you and i can never be apart.

i believe for you and me the sun will shine one day.

everlasting like the sun. live forever for the moment.

i need you now. so i'll hold on to it. don't you let it pass you by.
it's the state of bliss you think you're dreaming. it's the happiness inside that you're feeling. it's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry.

why do stars fall down from the sky.

see the dreams we left behind. and i'm glad cos' i was blessed to get to have you in my life.

and we'll linger on...

ohhh all the classic love songs i'm still in love with..
always an escape from everything else around me
i should listen to them more often =)

will you ever step back and take a look at all the damage that you've done
all that damage waiting to pounce right back on to you.

i've said i want to remember this
but not this way.

dont question me about what i've done to improve the situation
because this is all your work and no one's gonna help you clean up this mess.

i hope your conscience doesn't keep you awake at night.

all i've gotta learn is to let go. things are not gonna change for the better. at least not soon. so what better way to comfort myself than to leave these things behind?

if only i were.....
if only i could...

if only.

but i'm just a failure.

Do you ever feel like breaking down?
Do you ever feel out of place?
Like somehow you just don't belong
And no one understands you

Do you ever wanna run away?
Do you lock yourself in your room?
With the radio on turned up so loud
That no one hears you screaming

No you don't know what it's like
When nothing feels all right
You don't know what it's like
To be like me

To be hurt
To feel lost
To be left out in the dark
To be kicked when you're down
To feel like you've been pushed around
To be on the edge of breaking down
And no one's there to save you
No you don't know what it's like

Do you wanna be somebody else?
Are you sick of feeling so left out?
Are you desperate to find something more?
Before your life is over

Are you stuck inside a world you hate?
Are you sick of everyone around?
With their big fake smiles and stupid lies
While deep inside you're bleeding

No one ever lied straight to your face
And no one ever stabbed you in the back
You might think I'm happy
but I'm not gonna be okay

Everybody always gave you what you wanted
You never had to work it was always there
You don't know what it's like
what it's like

oh dear school's gonna start school's gonna start school's gonna start =C

received alot of christmas cards yesterday!
thanks guys.. for the little stuffs inserted with the cards =D
love you all!

got this froggy shower kit thingy from yt and ym!
yay it's GREEN and has a mirror. =P
(isn't that enough said)
erms... spongebob (musclebob buffpants) soft toy from yuteng
thanks!
food box from you!
okiee.. i'll try to eat more=P
lots of candy canes too!
hmm havent met up with shinyi and gang...
and xinyi!
havent given them their prezzies too
hope i see them soon

YAY GANG OUTING

okayy another year will be gone just like that (clicks fingers like i always do)
and here's 2009!
not really looking forward to it..

been to all the trainings i could and still have no idea why i'm not improving.
damn.
yepp back to the gym

hmm.. let's get me started on my new year resolutions.

*i'm not gonna spend so much time on neopets anymore!
(a little difficult though =P)
*i'll get back to pariss for another round of crabs and scallops
*spend even lesser money on clothes
(really cut down on that this year)
*study study study..
*try not to miss any trainings
*another year of champions in a div vb
*get out of singapore the day As end
*Queensland, Australia with Xinyi, Italy with you, Bintan with classmates!

okie.. this is turning into a Wishlist, instead of my Resolutions. 0.0
cant think of anything now since i'm still in the festive mood.
oh wells, i'll get back to it.
when i actually do =P

yay fireworks on new year's eve =D
and let's hope it'll be a blast after that too!

loveloves

hello people!
i havent blogged in AGES
=P

anyways...
went to Vietnam for an overseas service trip from 9th nov to 18th nov.
one word to describe it all.
WOW

hahaha
i shall try and remember what happened there!
oh yes.. PICTURES are in the link on the left...
under "picture me", then "OCIP Vietnam"
yep i know.. it's been like.. 10 days since i came back
i was just too lazy to blog cos uploading the pictures itself was already killing me =P

Day 1:
flight at 5 am, changi airport terminal 1, row 4
sis and wang sent me off =D
sooo exciting..
with gwee and tricia
boarded the plane
slept. and slept. and.. slept.
it was 7 in the morning for goodness sake
arrived at Tan Son Ngat Airport
Met Ngoc, Mai, Le! =D
had breakfast at Pho 24, chicken noodles and twister
(which everybody hadn't heard of and allll wanted to try)
bus ride...
had lunch at this really cool restaurant with really cool view
seafood, rice noodles, veggies, giant rice ball! =P
bus ride...
ferry terminal place.
got stuck "behind bars", laughing at ducks 0.0
took a ferry
reached ben tre, quite disturbed at the scene.. hmm..
bus ride...
Dong Khoi Hotel
dinner at restaurant...

Day 2:
breakfast - bread and eggs =D (yay i can remember)
bus ride...
reached Hung Nhuong Primary School!
began our first lesson on alphabets A-P
kids were sooo cute
lunch + stone
second lesson!
bus ride...
dinner...

Day 3:
breakfast - pork leg with rice noodle
bus ride...
third lesson on alphabets Q-Z
kids were sooo cute
lunch + stone
fourth lesson!
bus ride...
dinner...

oh oh oh i have to say this
i hated our toilet in the hotel!!
hahaha...
but tricia and i were soooo amused.
the flush wouldn't flush properly so i was kinda having a REALLY hard time flushing down what went into the toilet bowl.
it was sooo pissifying tricia and i decided to ask someone to help us unclog the toilet bowl.
and fair enough..
the flush was.. BETTER. =D

Day 4:
Breakfast - bread, jam, cheese, butter
bus ride...
fifth lesson on shapes
kids were sooo cute
lunch + stone
sixth lesson
bus ride...
dinner...

oh oh oh we had lunch in a house there...
homecooked food!
it was soooo delicious.
hahah gwee tricia and i wanted to award her with the best cook award. =P
but there was quite alot of beef in the dishes..
so i kinda could only take alot of dietary fibre.
but thanks to that i had a smooth trip
HAHAH (trying to not sound crude)

Day 5:
Breakfast - bread and siewmai
bus ride...
lacquering! painted the tables..
hahaha... quite fun =D
but i got alot of paint on myself!
yepp clumsy mee
so typical rightt
lunch + stone
sitting in for lesson on basic phrases and numbers
kids were sooo cute
volleyball game with the staff...
hahah so funn
and everybody was like.. zai
seriously. ;)
bus ride...
dinner...

hahaha okiee angela and tricia had their secret adventures on certain nights
and gwee and i were left to rot ourselves.
LOL
but oh wells..
we had our secret adventures too!
hahaha
so funn
but i taught angela how to play taitee!!
cindy and nikki came over on one night too!
i taught nikki bridge YAY

Day 6:
Breakfast - bread and eggs
bus ride
second last lesson on body parts, animals and numbers
kids were sooo cute
lunch + monkey with the kids! sooo funnnn
the rest of the team left for somewhere else..
programmes stayed back to teach the afternoon session kids =D
we just couldn't bear to leave heh.
last lesson with the kids...
haiys.
ceremony of completion of courtyard...
dinner in the school with the staff
pictures!
bus ride...
back to hotel.
sighs.
packing...

Day 7:
Breakfast - bread and eggs
left Dong Khoi Hotel
bus ride...
Mekong river tour
quite cool! seriously!
coconut candy, fruits, honey and tea
lunch...
coconut...
back to Ho Chi Minh, Rainbow Hotel
went out to walk in the city
dinner...
cards and crapping in Gwee's room
hahaha... angela went to have a secret adventure with tricia!
yuteng and lijie came over
played guitar sang songs watch tv

Day 8:
Breakfast - noodles
Cu Chi Tunnels!
coolest sightseeing place we went in this trip =D
looked at some exhibition stuffs...
crawled through the tunnels..
went all the way! =D
hahaha quite surprising for my claustrophobia rightt...
oh wells at least it was really interesting!
tea and tapioca...
lunch...
back to hotel.
went out to walk walk
dinner
water puppet show!
soo interesting.. and i still have no idea at all how they control the puppets 0.0
back to hotel
yuteng and lijie came over to write reflections
until like 3.30am?!
haha trust me we were distracted enough to write 1 paragraph in 1 hour.
HAHA
dieded in the morning cos of lack of sleep though =P

Day 9:
Breakfast - Bread and eggs
War remnants museum, Reunification Palace
Lunch
Ben Thanh market for shopping!
walked with angela tricia and gwee...
ate yoghurt at some restaurant while waiting for time to be up cos apparently we shop quite fast and we are very decisive people
back to hotel to change and stuffs
off to YMCA Vietnam Headquarters
cultural night and buffet dinner
caught in flood 0.0
still went back to hotel though...
talked and snacked through the night...
didn't sleep heh.

oh oh oh!
yay there was an angel-mortal game throughout the entire trip!
my mortal was Tor and...
yep i only had 1 letter from him cos he found out i was his angel and refused to reply anymore -.-
yay my angel was yuteng
and at least we still wrote after i found out he was my angel. HAHA.
hmm kinda my escape everyday after a day's work, other than phonecalls back home.
yepp... =D
yay angel!
hahah but i could've been smarter and found out my angel sooner then can take more pictures. hur.
oh wells.
oh yes. erm. please go learn how to differentiate a leopard from a cheetah
HAHA
the one in the person's office is a leopard. 0.0

Day 10:
Breakfast - bread and eggs
bus ride...
Tan Son Ngat airport again...
quite alot of things happened...
huiqi wasn't feeling well, david almost lost his passport, coco got stuck at customs
oh dear...
but at least allll of us came back in one piece =D
GREAT.
parted at changi airport...
quite sad really.
didn't want the trip to end just like that...
sigh.

loveloves to OCIPVietnam08! we rock.



but actually.. i was really glad to be back home too...
guess it was enough of seeing the world for now..
i'd be contented to stay in Singapore for a while longer...

really really glad when i saw you at the airport =)




went to sentosa today!
with shinyi zijia jiahui and kaihui!
yayyy shinyi and gang rocks my socks! hahaha
pictures will be up very very soon in the link to the left too!
hahhaa...
and hoorays to our forbidden city 0.0
haha it was soo cute
i like the bridge the most! =D
love you guys and can't wait for our christmas dinner together!
=D


i'm a happy girl =D

heyy guys..
i'm off to vietnam today!
yays

be back in 10 days and i'll update again then!
till 18th nov!

byes~
i'll miss you...